Biblical Parenting Advice from King Soloman

Biblical parenting is one the most important practices we can learn. God created the family as the backbone of society. Everything in our society, whether it be public schools, government, entertainment, churches, etc. reflects from the strength of our families. Parents must figure out how to manage work, school, extra curricular activities, household work, finances and any other thing that life throws at us and still have time to be a good parent. Being a good parent isn't something that just happens but it is something that requires hard work and dedication.

No matter how much a parent works at raising their kids right there will always be surprises that catch them off guard and send their heads swimming with what do I do now. There is no such thing as the perfect parent but the fact that you take it so seriously shows that you are moving in the right direction toward biblical parenting.

The Bible says that King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 Concubines. With this many wives it is safe to say that Solomon had many children. God's word also says that Solomon was blessed with a very special gift of wisdom. This wisdom enabled him to do greater things in the kingdom of Israel than any other king before or after him. In fact, while he was alive there was not even a king on the entire earth that could compare with him. All because he applied the wisdom he received from God. If there is any one thing that a parent needs more than anything, it is wisdom. There is no strategy or tip that will work for every child in every situation. It takes wisdom to know the child, to discern the situation, and to make rapid decisions. And these are just a few of the things biblical parenting is made of. It would be wise of us to take advice from such a wise parent on how to bring up our kids as well.

Much of the book of Proverbs is actually addressed to Solomon's children. Proverbs 1:8 says, "Listen, my son, to your father's instruction and do not forsake your mother's teaching." (NIV) In the hustle and bustle of each day many times parents neglect to actively teach their kids. Most kids are taught what they know from their friends at school, the media, and school in that order. Biblical parenting teaches their children the things that are most important at home. A parent must teach their kids about what they value the most and why. Kids must learn from their parents mistakes and successes.

Kids enjoy learning about the life experiences of their parents and what the results of some of their life choices were, whether good or bad. Parents must not assume that their children will figure out the important lessons of life on their own. This leaves a vacuum in the child's heart to be filled with all sorts of various ideas and philosophies. Kids are set up for failure if they aren't taught by their parents. Solomon taught his kids how to be successful according to Proverbs 1:3, "Their purpose is to teach people to live disciplined and successful lives,to help them do what is right, just, and fair." (NLT) All parents want their kids to succeed and it is up to them to teach them how.

"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." (Proverbs 22:6 NIV) Teaching alone is not enough for biblical parenting. A parent must also train their kids. Teaching is instruction but training is making kids follow the instructions. Training is difficult because most of the time it is training kids to do things they really do not want to do. It is one thing to teach a child the value of eating vegetables and it is another thing to actually make them eat vegetables. Some people teach their children that they should pray, but I remember how my mom trained me that I should pray. Every night before my brother and I would go to sleep my mom would come in and say nighttime prayers with us. This training stuck with me even during my rebellious teenage years. Even when I wasn't truly following God I still prayed and read my Bible every night before I went to bed. This training is probably one of the biggest factors that caused me to turn back to God later on.

Training is tough, just ask anyone who has been in the military and gone through basic training. Or ask anyone who has been on a competitive sports team and has gone through extensive training. But then ask them if the training was worth it. Training kids is tough on parents and children, but it is absolutely worth it when children succeeding later on in life. Training is essential in biblical parenting.

"He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." (Proverbs 13:24 NIV) Discipline is a double edged sword, it is both positive and negative. It is positive in that it teaches and trains as described earlier. It is negative in that it corrects when teaching and training are not followed. Teaching and training must absolutely occur first before any disciplinary actions are taken. Otherwise it is an unjust punishment that does no good and has potential to do harm.

When a child understands that they are receiving negative consequences for not following what they have been taught and trained to do then it is healthy and and essential part of biblical parenting. Teaching and training alone are not enough. The teaching and training must be enforced or it is for nothing. This enforcement is called discipline. Even after parents work their hardest to teach and train their kids, children will still do the exact opposite. That is O.K. it doesn’t mean that you failed as a parent, it means that your kids are 100% normal. That is why the bible says we must be careful to discipline.

To love one another is the second greatest commandment according to Jesus. (Matthew 22:39) Nearly everyone loves their children with parental affection, but loving children with the love of God is a much higher level. First Corinthians 13:4-8 is the definition of biblical love, it says, "Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." (NLT) When parents are impatient with children they are not loving them with the love of God. When parents are irritable with their children or keep bring up wrong things they have done, they are not loving them with the love of God.

Loving children with the love of God according to these verses is the apex of biblical parenting. If a parent fails in other areas but succeeds in the area of love they are a success. However, if a parent excels in all other areas and fails in the area of love they have truly failed their children. Sometimes it is hard for parents to show the God kind of love to kids. Children at times will test and try their parents in every way imaginable, but it is the number one thing parents must do in biblical parenting. We can teach, train and discipline all we want too but if it is not done in love it is all for nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)